In the still of the morning, before the dawn's first light,
Something's lurking in your kitchen tonight.
He's not Count Chocula… he's much, much worse…
Better grab your milk and call a nurse.
He crept from the pantry 'bout a quarter past three,
With a carton of milk, on a sugar spree.
Bowl in one hand, spoon in the other,
He's coming for your breakfast, better hide under the cover.
He's got an appetite that just won't quit,
And your cereal's doomed — every bite of it.
He's a cereal killer, bowl in his hand!
(Cereal killer — breakfast of the damned!)
He don't want fame, he don't want loot,
He just wants your Froot Loops, that's the truth!
He's a cereal killer, with a spoon so cold,
(Pour another bowl before your soul gets sold!)
Now the milk's gone missing, the kitchen's a fright,
And he's chompin' down breakfast in the midnight light!
(Midnight light!)
He hit the cupboard, yeah, one by one,
Snapped, crackled, popped — now the damage is done.
Cap'n Crunch tried to make a stand,
But he slipped on milk and lost command.
Cheerios screamed, the flakes all fled,
There's no escape when your breakfast is dead!
He's a cereal killer, bowl in his hand!
(Cereal killer — breakfast of the damned!)
He don't want fame, he don't want loot,
He just wants your Froot Loops, that's the truth!
He's a cereal killer, with a spoon so cold,
(Pour another bowl before your soul gets sold!)
Now the milk's gone missing, the kitchen's a fright,
And he's chompin' down breakfast in the midnight light!
(Midnight light!)
He took a bite of Lucky Charms,
Then vanished with a crunch.
Frosted Flakes were last to go —
Tony never finished lunch.
Now every morning's haunted
By that clinking spoon of doom…
If you hear "snap, crackle, pop,"
He's already in your room!
(He's in your room!)
He's a cereal killer, bowl in his hand!
(Cereal killer — breakfast of the damned!)
From the Keys to the coast, he's a legend they say,
With a spoon and a smile, he'll ruin your day!
He's a cereal killer — the morning's his prey,
Now grab your milk and run away!
(Run away! Run away!)
Remember, kids…
Always check behind the cereal box…